


my love for you is endless

by bousgii_greenpet



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Alternate Universe - Hogwarts, Best Friends, Friends to Lovers, Kim Namjoon | RM Is Whipped, M/M, Magic, Min Yoongi | Suga Is Whipped, they are just soft and in love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-11
Updated: 2018-09-11
Packaged: 2019-07-11 04:04:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15964310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bousgii_greenpet/pseuds/bousgii_greenpet
Summary: The day of Namjoon’s birthday something astonishing and unbelievable happened.





	my love for you is endless

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you SO much Jae (@sequoiasem) for being my amazing beta and mentor!! You're truly an angel! 
> 
> It was written for namgiweek on twitter *.*

Namjoon started receiving odd letters in September of his last year of Hogwarts. The letters were rather strange because they were full of poems, words of love and passion, and Namjoon didn’t know what he should do with them. It was a bizarre feeling – to receive love letters from a secret admirer – he was a bit embarrassed, a bit happy and quite a bit puzzled. They kept coming in October, and November, and were still coming in December.

 “Who can it be?” Namjoon wondered, reading a new one at breakfast.

“It’s them again?” Yoongi asked dryly. He was sitting right next to Namjoon at the table in the Great Hall, reading some incredibly boring book for his classes.  

“Yeah,” Namjoon sighed, “How can I answer them if I don’t know the name?”

“I guess that’s the point,” Yoongi said, pushing his glasses back on his nose, “They are your _secret admirer._ ”

“I don’t get it,” Namjoon sighed, sounding sad and exhausted, “Why can’t they just confess? It’s… it's giving me a headache. I don’t want to date anyone... because exams are coming... and I have to study. I don’t have time for dating… But I can’t tell them about that and I don’t want to give them a false hope.”

Yoongi was silent. He was always silent during breakfast in the Great Hall. He was sleepy, hungry and terribly behind on his homework, so he just listened to his friends and sometimes nodded, but that was it. Namjoon, on the other hand, desperately wanted to talk to someone about his big and long-standing problem.

Shortly after Jungkook  and Hoseok joined them. At first they didn’t seem to notice Namjoon’s gloomy mood, but as Jungkook excitedly talked about the quidditch match the next day Hoseok interrupted him.

“Joon, what’s wrong?” he asked softly.

“It’s the same old thing again,” Yoongi answered before Namjoon could say anything.  

“Your secret admirer?” Hoseok exclaimed, looking both happy and terrified, “Really? What did it say?”

Namjoon gave him the letter and Hoseok started to read it out loud.

“Oh my god, not this sappy letter again,” Yoongi said, scrunching his nose. “I gotta go. See you later.”

“See you!”

Yoongi was Namjoon’s best friends. They had met on the train during Namjoon’s first year of Hogwarts. Namjoon had been a shy and scared first year and Yoongi, seeing the boy’s distress, talked to him a lot, trying to calm him down and answer the million questions Namjoon had about Hogwarts. Yoongi was calm, and cool, and smiley, and before they reached the school Namjoon wanted to become friends with him.

And he did. Now – after many years of enduring friendship – they were still an inseparable pair. Yoongi was his anchor, his saver, his joy and his sadness. It was Yoongi who helped him with his Transfiguration homework when he just couldn’t get it right. It was Yoongi who calmed him down when Namjoon got upset at his inability to cast a simple spell now matter how many times he tried. It was Yoongi with whom he sneaked into the Honeydukes and got caught (Professor Ahn made them rearrange all the books in her classroom, and they were so exhausted that fell asleep together on Namjoon’s bed.)

It was Yoongi whom Namjoon loved - _desperately and tenderly_ \- but, not wanting to ruin their friendship he never confessed. There was no way Yoongi would ever love him back that way.

This love - painful but beautiful and glorious - had lived in his heart for years and he didn't know what to do with it. He was lost and scared but still very much in love with his best friend.

 

***

 

There was another letter the next morning. He opened it slowly, curious to find what poem it would be this time.  He really loved every poem his admirer sent him even if he would never ever admit it.

  


_“How sweet it is!... But, gods, how it is dangerous –_   
_To hear you, to caught your dear gaze!.._   
_Can I forget your smile, your looking, languorous_   
_And talking, magical and full of inner blaze?_   
_O, fairy, why… why have I seen you ever? –_   
_Had known you, I got the Heavens bliss_ _  
_ And cursed my Eden in the flaming fervor.

 

**_MY_ ** _love for you is endless.”_

 

Jungkook looked over Namjoon’s shoulder sneakily and then exclaimed: “Why do they always write this strange and senseless phrase? What does it even mean? My love for you is endless… Such a nonsense!”

Namjoon blushed and quickly put the letter in his pocket.

“Don’t read other people’s letters, Kook, that’s impolite,” Yoongi said lazily, not looking up from reading the Daily Prophet. It seemed like he had no interest in these mysterious letters.

“Yeah!” Namjoon said, still looking a bit sheepish.

“Anyway,” Hoseok said. “I think it some kind of a code… A riddle!”

“Why?” Namjoon asked, puzzled. “I think they don’t want to reveal their name, no?”

“Maybe they-” Hoseok started, but he was rudely interrupted by Yoongi.

“Come on, let’s talk about something more interesting. The game. The quidditch game.”

Hoseok, Jungkook and Namjoon shared a look.

“But… Yoongi, you hate talking about quidditch!” Hoseok frowned.

“Yeah, but it’s much more interesting than talking about these ridiculous letters. Joon said that he doesn’t want to date anyone and the person, whoever is sending them, is a fool. Throw them away.  Come on, Joon, just throw them away! You always say that you don't need them.”

“No,” he answered, looking a bit offended and _scared._ “No, these are my letters and I’ll keep them.”

“Joon, do you seriously think someone would send you these letters hoping that you will love _him_ back?” Yoongi said angrily. “It’s a joke. I’m sure. Someone is just playing a joke on you.”

“What?” Namjoon asked, shocked. He looked betrayed. “What the hell are you talking about?!”

“I…”

“You’re just jealous that I’m loved but you’re not!”

As soon as these (mendacious and awful) words left his mouth he regretted them. But one cannot unring a bell.

“You know what? Fine!” Yoongi stood up. “I… I don’t wanna talk to you.”

And he was gone.

Namjoon felt terrible.

“But why did he say _him_? Does he know who is sending these letters?” Jungkook asked quality.

“I don’t… don’t think he knows. It’s just… no, he can’t know,” Namjoon whispered. “I think it just was a slip of the tongue.”

Hoseok sighed, “You have to apolo—”

“I know!” Namjoon said loudly, “I gotta go. Need to finish my homework before classes start.”

Both Jungkook and Hoseok knew it was a lie. Namjoon was a good, dedicated student. He never finished his homework last minute. But they didn’t speak a word to him, and shortly Namjoon was gone.

  
  


***

  


Namjoon hated fighting with Yoongi (he hated fighting with all of his friends but especially with Yoongi). He hated not speaking with Yoongi, not spending time with him, being constantly angry or upset because of their stupid fight.

Namjoon knew it was his fault and he desperately wanted to apologize. His words had been harsh and dumb. He hadn’t really mean it. He never did, but when he got angry he often did or said stupid things on the spur of the moment, not thinking properly.

After lunch Hoseok and Jungkook decided to spend some time in the library, preparing for their exams. Yoongi expressed a desire to sleep and was left alone in their shared bedroom. Namjoon decided that it would be a good chance to apologize.

Yoongi was reading a muggle magazine about space and didn’t even cast a glance in Namjoon’s direction when he entered the room.

“Um, Yoongi? Namjoon felt awful and awkward standing there being completely ignored. “Can we, um, talk?”

Yoongi finally looked at him.

“M? What if I don’t want to?”

“Please, I really want to apologize!” Namjoon whined. “I was so stupid and I really didn’t want to talk about all these stupid things. I…I was so, so stupid. It’s just because I’m so tired and stressed all the time: because of exams, these stupid, unnecessary love letters… I just… I didn’t mean it, you know. I’m so sorry, Yoongs, so sorry. Please forgive me.”

Yoongi sighed and closed the magazine.

“Yeah, that was kinda harsh, not gonna lie.”

“I’m sorry! I truly _am_!”

“You better be!” Namjoon saw a small smile on his face – it was a good sign.  

Namjoon flopped on the bed right next to Yoongi and gave him a little, shy smile.  

“You know, I love you… I mean… as a friend. You’re my best friend in the entire world and I love you.”

It was surprisingly easy to say these words – the words of love - to Yoongi. Maybe one day _– just maybe_ – he would find courage to really confess.

“Yeah, I know.” Yoongi looked down and blushed. Namjoon didn’t know why his face was red or why he was embarrassed but he didn’t want to ask and ruin the moment.

“Friends?” he asked instead.

“Friends,” Yoongi smiled, shoving him playfully. “But don't ever say any of that again, okay?”

 

***

 

The day of Namjoon’s birthday something astonishing and unbelievable happened.

They were sitting at the table, having a leisurely breakfast and talking about plans for Namjoon’s birthday party later when suddenly the air flinched. All the teachers jumped from their seats,  wands in hand.

The Great Hall started to change. The walls seemed to disappear; tables and portrait became stones and trees.

Namjoon found himself standing on the slope of a mountain and he couldn't believe his eyes. Just a few moments ago they were sitting at the tables in the Great Hall but now there were huge, majestic mountains around them. Both teachers and students were shocked and started excitingly talking about what was going on.

Namjoon held out a hand, catching a snowflake, but he didn’t feel anything. It wasn’t cold, it was just nothing. It looked very snowy but the temperature was the same as moments ago.

_So strange_ , he thought, looking around. Yoongi was looking at him, and his face was different, odd, a bit shocked and… Namjoon couldn’t find the words to describe it, but in the same exact moment he thought, _God, I love him so much._

And that was it. He decided that he would confess. Tonight. He was so tired of hiding his secret, of lying, of constantly finding excuses. It was enough. He had to confess, he had to tell Yoongi that he loved him. Had  it really been that simple all along?

Suddenly Hoseok grabbed his hand and pointed up.

“Namjoon, look!”

There, in the sky, was a phrase, written in gold, sparkly letters, floating in the air: _“I heard you love mountains. This is my present for you._ **_MY_ ** _love for you is endless.”_

“Oh my god! It’s your admirer!” whispered Hoseok, still in shock, “How did they manage to cast _this_ spell?”

“This spell?” Namjoon asked, still looking at the sky. It was a miracle, some sort of bloody miracle, right in front of his eyes.

“It is very powerful illusion magic. It’s very difficult spell, not even all the teachers can do it,” he answered, “Whoever they are, this person is madly in love with you, Joon. This is insane!”

“Maybe it’s one of the teachers then?” Jungkook suggested. Namjoon and Hoseok turned to him, their faces were full of horror, “What?”

“Do you really think that a teacher is in love with me? Who? Oh, god, this is unbelievable! That’s… that’s… god! So inappropriate! It can’t be true!”

All at once the mountains disappeared, as if it was some kind of a dream. Everything went back to normal. The Great Hall grew loud with conversation: teachers and students started to discuss everything the remarkable event.

“Joon, I know it sounds insane, but I think Jungkook is right,” Hoseok said, looking scared. “It has to be a teacher. No student can cast this spell, it’s ridiculously difficult.”

“That’s not… I… I need to think. I want out of here, need some air.” Namjoon stood up. Yoongi stood too, a little smile on his face.

“How about we go for a walk, Joon?” Yoongi asked softly, putting his hand on Namjoon’s shoulder.

Namjoon looked at him, scared and horrified. That was it. It was now or never.

“Yeah, let’s go.”

 

***

 

The walk wasn’t as delightful as usual.  Namjoon couldn’t stop thinking about confessing. He was so nervous his hands were shaking,  his heart thumped fast and hard, and he was sweating like crazy. The thought _I love him I love him I have to say it now I have to say it I can’t_ circled his head more times than he could count _._

Yoongi was his best friend. He would understand. Maybe he would turn it into a joke so that Namjoon wouldn’t be embarrassed; or he would simply say something like “sorry, I don’t feel the same way but I hope we still can be friends, Joon.”

Namjoon was on the verge of bursting into tears or passing out.  Still he walked.

The weather was fine: sunny, bright, maybe a bit cold but even the sun couldn’t calm him down. They were walking alone near the lake, their favorite place to hide from the world. Up ahead, near the rowan tree, they had spent countless hours together: talking, studying, reading magical magazines and practicing new spells. Namjoon was quite fond of the tree usually but right now he was so nervous that he couldn’t admire its beauty.    

Just when they reached the tree Yoongi stopped, looking at Namjoon with something like fear in his eyes.

“Joon-ah, I need to tell you something,” he said, immediately looking away.

Yoongi looked terrified, and Namjoon couldn’t figure out why. He didn’t even look him in the eyes, as if he was more interested in those bloody trees, and the lake, and the castle, than talking to Namjoon. _That_ was strange too. Yoongi never avoided his gaze.

 

_Why?_ Namjoon thought to himself. _Why is he so afraid? It’s_ me _who is gonna confess, I should be terrified, not him._

“It’s really important and I hope…” Namjoon saw that Yoongi’s hands were trembling. “I hope you understand.”

“Hey, Yoongi, what’s wrong?” Namjoon asked softly, trying to calm him down, even if he was nervous himself. “Why… Why are you so…”

“Namjoon, please, let me speak and please, _please_ don’t interrupt me, okay?” Namjoon nodded, still trying to process what was going on. “Well… I know it’ll sound stupid and I’m sure you’ll be not happy about everything I’m gonna tell you now, but…” Yoongi stopped for a moment, trying to collect himself, “Oh, God… this is so difficult. This love has been living inside my heart for years now but I can’t find proper words to… God… Please, don’t laugh at me but I am truly, passionately in love with you, Namjoon. I love you, not like a friend, you know. I just love you, yes, I do, and this love is killing me, gosh. W-well… I said it.”

Namjoon couldn’t believe his ears. Was he dreaming? Was it really some sort of magical and wonderful dream? Or was Yoongi under some sort of charm? He could not… He…

“You love me?” Namjoon asked quietly.

Yoondi nodded, still not looking at him. He was so small and vulnerable now that Namjoon wanted to hold him tight and never let go.

“You can’t… can’t be in love with me,” Namjoon said, still not quite believing that they were talking about it.

“W-what? Why?”

“Because I’m in love with _you,”_ Namjoon looked down at his shoes. “I, um, really like you. A lot.”

And then there was a silence – one of those awful silences where Namjoon couldn’t tell what to expect.

“That’s why… I didn’t want this person – _the secret admirer_ – to send me these letters. Yeah, I’m flattered that someone put so much effort into these things, like… this thing with mountains was so cool but I don’t want them to do it. I want them to know that my heart is already taken… by you… And… God, Yoongi, how did this even happen?”

Namjoon looked up at Yoongi and saw him smiling. It was one of his amazing, bright as a sun smiles that Namjoon loved dearly.

“This is strange,” Yoongi said, carefully placing his hand on Namjoon waist. “All these years,” Oh, god, did he just said years? “I thought my love was unrequited. I thought that you think about me as a friend – nothing more. And now… I’m so… happy?”

Namjoon pulled him in for a hug. The hands on his waist made him melt against his best friend’s chest. Yoongi immediately nuzzled into his warm neck, signing happily.

“Speaking of your secret admirer...” Namjoon – to be honest – didn’t want to speak about other people right now but Yoongi seemed a little concerned about it so he let him talk. “Um, this will also sound stupid but it was me.”

Namjoon immediately pulled back looking at Yoongi’s face in amazement.

“What?”

“It was me,” Yoongi repeated.

“But… but… why? W-what? Why?” Namjoon was very confused about this whole situation. “This spell! Hoseok said that it’s almost impossible to cast and even some teachers can’t do it!”

Yoongi blushed and Namjoon found it adorable.

“Yeah, I know. It is a very difficult spell but I really wanted to surprise you and give you something unexpected and beautiful. You always talkabout mountains, snow and all this stuff so… I found this old book in the library and have been practicing for a while.”

“But… Yoongi, this is… God! This is the best present I’ve ever received! I love you, gosh, I love you so much!”

Namjoon had never kissed anyone before and he didn’t know how it should feel but he was sure that kissing Yoongi was the best thing in the entire world. Their lips met, and it was so soft, sweet and lovely. Namjoon just held him tight and kissed, kissed, kissed Yoongi breathless, feeling utterly and unbelievably happy.

When they broke apart Namjoon once again saw this bright, amazing smile on Yoongi’s face. God, he was so in love with this boy that seeing him smiling like that made Namjoon the happiest man alive.

“But I have a question,” he said suddenly. “What does _MY love is endless mean_?”

At first Yoongi looked at him a bit confused but then he burst into laughter.

“Oh… this is awkward!” he said, wiping his tears. “I thought I should put my initials – M and Y – but then I was scared that you would easily reveal my identity. I didn’t want to confess in the beginning, couldn’t find the courage to do it. So… I was too lazy to rewrite the whole letter so I just put some random, sappy words after trying to make it look like a sentence,” Namjoon laughed. “Don’t laugh, please, I know it’s stupid-”

“Yeah, that’s stupid but so you.”

Yoongi smiled him bright and once again nuzzled into his neck.

“Please, let’s pretend it never happened.”

“Oh, no, how can I ever forget about your sappiness?” Namjoon said teasingly. “Yoongs, you know what? My love for you is endless.”

Yoongi groaned.

“Shut up! I changed my mind. I don’t love you anymore!” He tried to walk away but Namjoon pulled him back and kissed him in the forehead.

“Of course you love me.”

“Yeah, I do.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> you can find me on twitter: @bousgii  
> or (if you know russian) you can find my russian fics here: https://ficbook.net/authors/25712
> 
> thank you so much! i hope you liked it. this was my first ever english fic (jae helped me A LOT. she is a ray of sunshine!)


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